Improve Your Speaking Skills
Suggestions on how to improve your public speaking skills, including preparation, practice/rehearsal, personal appearance and dealing with stage fright.
Sooner or later, we all are called upon to get up in front of a group of people and speak. This can be either a harrowing or pleasant experience. The following tips are designed to make public speaking less stressful. Less stress means a more relaxed and confident you and makes a better impression.
· Be prepared. Know your subject. If possible, make up index cards with notes or key phrases to refer to during your speech. Do not put the entire speech on the cards and read it word for word. You will look stiff, sound uninteresting and bore your audience. If you can choose the topic you are to speak on yourself, opt for something you enjoy as a hobby or which you have read a lot about because it interests you. Your passion for the subject will come through in your delivery.
· Know your audience. Many people overlook this important strategy. Knowing who you will talk to can help you to tailor what you will say to that group. Let's say, for example, that you are going to speak to a group of senior citizens about ways to maximize their investments and earn more money for retirement. Since your target audience is older and has less time to wait for long term investments to pay off, you will want to discuss plans that are short term but at the same time have good yields. This same talk given to a group of people in their twenties would emphasize the benefits of long term strategies.
Practice/Dress rehearsal. Do several run-throughs of your talk. Gather any props you will use, such as photos or charts. If you are using a multimedia presentation, make sure your equipment is operating correctly. You might even get a family member or a friend to observe your rehearsal and give you constructive feedback. Use a video camera and tape yourself in your run-through. Most people are uncomfortable watching themselves on tape but as painful as this may be, it can provide you will a point of view you cannot get any other way. Don't be overly critical but do look for any major gaffes. You will want to practice your speech as many times as it takes to become comfortable and natural with the material and visual aids. Your speech should flow and practice will make that happen.
· Image. Always look your best when addressing any group. If the group will be casually dressed, you can wear a nice business casual outfit of khaki slacks, a polo shirt and loafers. But that's about as casual as you should go. Jeans, t-shirts, wrinkled, dirty and/or torn clothing is not appropriate when speaking in front of a group. Make sure your hair is clean and neat. For women, makeup should be applied in moderation. You want people to listen to what you are saying rather than to be preoccupied with how you look.
· Stage fright. Everyone who has spoken in front of a group has experienced stage fright at one time or another. The good news is that once you begin your talk and warm to your subject, the stage fright usually goes away. Occasionally someone will experience stage fright to such an extent that it cripples them and they cannot continue, but that is very rare. You may find it helpful sit quietly for a few minutes before your speech and gather your thoughts, breathing deeply. Visualization techniques, such as athletes use, will train your brain not to be afraid and mentally walking-through the exercise many times will imprint on your subconscious that there is no other option but success.
These tips can help assure that giving a speech or a presentation will be as pleasant for you as it is for your audience. Good luck! You're well prepared and ready. Break a leg!
Improve Your Writing Skills
Question no more how to improve your writing skills! You will be able to stretch your imagination and your use of words with these five writing exercises that explore description and metaphors.
I take writing classes and workshops whenever I can. It's so easy to get stuck in a rut, but when you have someone dishing out writing assignments, you're forced to pull yourself out. Here are 5 exercises I've done over the years. Stretch yourself!
1) Take a mediocre, horrible or fabulous piece of your writing. It doesn't need to be long, just writing. Go through it and look for non-descript words, such as 'nice', 'beautiful' and 'wonderful'. List these words, and detail what they are actually supposed to be describing.
A nice outfit - Nice means as many things as there are people! Does nice mean green or blue? Cotton or polyester? A skirt or pants? Matching or eclectic?
A beautiful day - Some folks like rain, some love the sun. Are there clouds? Is it morning or evening? Is it a day to lounge at home or go out and socialize? What constitutes a beautiful day? Beauty? What's that?
You can see by these examples that non-descriptive words rob your writing of what makes it unique - you!
2) This is one of my favorites. I came across it as I was studying metaphors. On the left side of the page, list tangible nouns. Ocean, flood, steam shovel, cinder block, spoon. On the right side of the page, list intangible nouns. Respect, desire, hunger, flight. Now combine them in a phrase like this:
'a of '. Examples would be 'an ocean of respect', a spoonful of desire'. Let yourself get carried away with this, and you will come up with some very powerful images.
3) Open up a dictionary. Choose a word and write about it for 10 minutes, non-stop. Choose another word and do the same. Choose a third and write 10 more minutes. Although you have three different words, there may be a common thread running through them. Look for it. The day I did this, the rainy weather permeated my three pieces of random writing. If a thread is not there, try and connect these three separate pieces of writing.
4) Make a list about something. Choose something ordinary and make a list of things about it or related to it. Do it off the top of your head, taking just 10 minutes or so. Now read it. You will feel a rhythm to it after a few lines, and it will sound poetic. If you make a list about a kiss or love or flowers, you may have a sweet poem when you're done.
The class I did this in listed a yard sale. Sounds dull? It was actually very interesting to hear what everyone had to say about a yard sale, the contents, the seller, the other buyers, the type of day it was and so on. A yard sale is not dull subject matter!
5) Find a picture in a magazine. Make sure it interests you. Look this picture over carefully for just a minute and write about it for at least 10 minutes. Describe the detail, the light, the subject matter. Are there people? What are they thinking? How did they get there? Who are they? You could do the traditional 'Who What When Where Why' routine. You'll be surprised at how much you can see in a picture when you have to!
These are just a few exercises to keep your creativity flowing. You can enhance them by doing them with your writing friends, too. It's entertaining and enlightening to hear how others respond to the same exercises. Don't be afraid to try a class or a workshop, either! Good luck and have fun!
Improve Your Reading Skills
Learn how to improve your reading skills by following the tips in this article!
Improving your reading skills can be one of the most important steps you can take in order to enhance your business life as well as your personal life. No matter what reading level you may be at at the present time, you can improve your skills by increasing your reading speed as well as your level of comprehension.
We were taught to read words starting at the left side of the page and proceeding across to the right. As our eyes move across the written page of words, our eyes tend to make short, jumpy movements. Whenever our eyes stop on a word, that is known as fixation. Some people tend to fixate on one word at a time across the page. This makes for slow, awkward reading. The best way you can improve your reading speed is to fixate on a larger group of words at a time. Learn to avoid fixating on words like a, an, the, or, etc. These words are insignificant and can usually be scanned over without missing the point of the story, essay, article, etc. The larger the group of words you learn to fixate on, the faster your reading speed will become automatically.
Look at this sentence- The moose ran over the hill and jumped over a fallen log. The key words are moose ran, over, hill, jumped, over, fallen log. By concentrating on them, you can understand the message of the sentence. The other words- the, over, the, and, a- can be read over quickly without missing the essential information that the sentence has to offer. The point is not to skip over or omit words in your reading, but to concentrate instead on the important words which make up the essential message of the sentence.
Another hindrance to speed in reading is the practice of moving your lips while you read. Moving your lips is simply a way of concentrating on the material that you are reading. It is a negative practice that tends to slow your eye movement down. Think about it- what can move faster, your lips or your mouth? You can put an end to this bad habit by consciously making yourself stop moving your lips. As your reading speed increases, you won't be able to hold onto this bad habit because your eyes will be moving too fast.
Lack of concentration is another typical problem area in reading. You can conquer this problem by practicing to improve your concentration every day. Set a short amount of time, such as ten to fifteen minutes on your kitchen timer. Have your book or other chosen reading material ready, and start reading. Block out any background noises that you may hear. Make a conscious effort and ignore everything else in the room except the material you are reading. When the timer goes off, immediately stop reading. Now, test yourself by recalling what you have just read. Check back to the text and see how much information you actually remembered. If your recall wasn't very good, re-read the text and time your self again, then try to recall the information once more. Practice this reading exercise every day and increase your reading time.
Like everything else that is worth doing, practice makes perfect, and the more you read, the better reader you will become!
Improve Your Listening Skills
How can I improve my listening skills? Read to find out the importance of redeveloping this skill.
Conversation is an art. People can be enjoyable to talk with, or they can be bores. A person is sought out for conversation, not because of the content of what they say, but for their ability to understand others. Good listeners are the individuals who are perceived to be charismatic, insightful, and even enlightened. These people make others feel special; they have friends and followers to spare.
Some people feel that good listeners are born, but as it are with most worthwhile activities. Listening is a skill that can be learned, practiced and perfected. It begins by educating oneself on the techniques, and practicing these in day to day interactions. The following exercises are a beginning enrooted to becoming an expert listener.
1. The first skill is attending. This includes making eye contact, leaning toward the individual talking, and gently nodding the head to indicate approval and understanding. These behaviors suggest that the listener is following what is being said, and is receptive to the information
2. The second step is empathic responses. These responses are meant to identify the underlying feelings of the words that the speaker is uttering. When people are talking what they really want other people to hear is how a given situation makes them feel. Using this technique lets them know you are listening to what they are really feeling. Empathic responses begin with empathy starters:
"It sounds like you were.......(angry, sad, frustrated, excited, etc.)"
"You were feeling .........(Down, upset, thrilled, etc.)"
"What I am hearing is that you......(weren't appreciated, were letdown, wanted someone to care......)"
"You felt.........(Lonely, excluded, frightened, relieved, etc.)
These are just a few examples of ways to identify the feelings of the speakers. As illustrated by the parenthetical information, each of these statements can be used to clarify many different feelings. Use these often in a conversation. They are open ended and encourage the speaker to explore their own understanding of their feelings.
3. Paraphrase the content of what is being shared. Often a speaker will get so involved in talking, he/she will lose track of what they say. Paraphrasing in a concise manner can clarify for both the speaker and the listener. Paraphrasing is useful when it is not easy to decipher what the feelings are behind the words. This technique can help the person talking expand, and reveal what he/she really wants to express.
4. Ask questions. This technique is valuable but dangerous. If the wrong question is asked it can lead the conversation in a dead end direction. If a man wishes to talk about how hurt he is over a break-up, and is asked, "Why did you let that one go? She was gorgeous." The man will be further saddened by his loss, and will feel like a loser. In most cases the speaker does not want to be asked, "Why...." Questions that begin with "˜Why' generally offer some type of blame or judgment. Good questions might be:
"How did that make you feel?"
"What did that mean to you?"
"Where do you think you will go from here?"
All these examples encourage further exploration, and do not suggest judgment of any kind.
5. The last and perhaps the most important technique to be discussed, is silence. Silence makes people uncomfortable. It is laden with thought, and sometimes pain. Too often people are afraid to wait out the silence and jump in to fill it up with words. A good listener is comfortable with silence, and knows that it bears much emotional fruit. Sometimes waiting out several minutes of silence will give the speaker a chance to dig deep for a much needed insight. The listener needs to sit through the silence and let the speaker sort through the angst. Mastering the silence is an important achievement.
Practicing these techniques does not mean good listeners will never get to express themselves again. There is a time to listen and a time to talk. But being a caring person means a person makes an effort to listen when others are in crisis. These techniques can be vital in developing intimacies and supporting loved ones. Making a conscious effort to listen will enhance a person's ability to understand, insights into problems, and overall conversation skills.
Improve Your Listening Skills: 3 Steps
Business clients express opinions and stories in every conversation. These opinions and stories hold the keys to fantastic opportunities that are laid out for our use. The problem is that while these stories are being told, we often allow our minds to wander on to greener pastures. The secret to capitalizing on the opportunities is to listen on purpose. There is a very simple mind game that can be played while listening that will assist in maximizing each bit of information that is expressed. There are 3 vital skills that must be developed in order to become an accomplished Listener.
1. Visualize what is being said - Remember that your client is expressing information that will assist you in accomplishing your goals later on in the conversation. Visualize the memory of your client’s wild college days. These memories are important to your client and if they are important to you, this will serve as a foundation for your success.
2. Listen to body language - There are a couple effective tools to remember about body language. Refrain from leaning back and crossing your arms in front of your chest. This will give the perception of being bored or having a closed mind. It is also important to maintain eye contact without staring. Remember that professional boxers use staring before a fight to intimidate and express a confrontational attitude. It is wise to occasionally catch the Speakers eye and then break the contact with a polite nod of your head. This shows that you are interested and paying attention.
3. The mind game of listening - This game will allow you to practice your listening skills and will naturally hone your ability to effective accumulate information. The game is to keep the conversation as exciting as possible, meanwhile accumulating as much information as possible without revealing anything about you. As you listen and process what is being said, ask yourself how this information can help you achieve your goals. This game will teach you to avoid thinking about your own stories and opinions while the Speaker is talking. The greatest honor that can be given is your undivided attention.
There are two benefits to Listening. First is that we are building a storehouse of information that can be used to our advantage. The second is that once we bestow the honor of our attention to someone, it is only right and proper for them to give their attention back to us. We will then be able to utilize the information to complete our goals without interruptions.
Tips for Becoming A Good Listener
The old adage reminds us that we are born with two ears but just one mouth, suggesting we should listen twice as much as we speak.
In addition, we need to become skilled listeners so that we can benefit from information shared by others as well as provide a response that will benefit them as much as ourselves.
Listening is hard, because it means turning off our thoughts and emotions to focus on those of the person who is speaking. Most of us prefer airing our own ideas over listening to those of others. Yet many companies today will pay an expert trainer to come and educate employees about how to effectively use their ears in the workplace.
Good listening skills can be learned rather easily. All it takes is a little bit of time and a commitment to the task.
1. Stop talking. If your mouth is moving, your ears must be at rest. Give your mouth a break and let the ears do their job. When someone else is speaking, give that person your full attention. Don't interrupt except to ask a brief question for clarification or to make an affirming sound, such as "uh huh," "oh!" or "hm."
2. Affirm what you hear. When the person stops speaking, repeat back in your own words what you thought you heard. Ask if that is what the speaker intended. If not, allow the person to explain further and again try restating the main idea until the two of you agree on the basic message. This may take a few passes, especially if conflict is involved.
3. Be patient. Avoid the temptation to finish other people's sentences for them. Give them a chance to say what they mean, even if they stutter, pause, or change verbal gears.
4. Redirect to the focus if a speaker digresses. While nodding sympathetically as the speaker heads down a tangential road, watch for a lull and say something about the original topic:
"So it sounds like the report will be due soon."
"Did I understand your main concern for this project to be the budget?"
5. Use body language to support your listening skills. Adopt a listener's pose: eyes fixed on the speaker, occasional nodding or smiling in response, facing toward the person, arms relaxed, no fidgeting or looking at your watch or the wall clock.
6. When the person finishes speaking, ask questions as needed. Jot down answers so you can take needed information with you.
7. Arrange for follow-up details. If you would like further resources, ask the speaker if you can email the request or telephone when the person's schedule is not busy. You also may wish to exchange business cards.
8. Maintain courtesy even if you disagree with the speaker. Never heckle, argue with, or rant against the speaker, no matter what is said. Save your opinions for a private meeting. Be polite and respectful, and fully hear the person out. You'll make yourself look bad if you respond in an emotional or inappropriate manner.
Listening requires the art of tuning in to another person and maintaining full attention until the person stops speaking. While this can be difficult with long-winded people, a positive outcome can be achieved with a willingness to hear what the other person wants to convey.